Beauty Tips

What to Do When Acne Ruins Your Self-Esteem

Psychologists weigh in on how to accept yourself — zits and all

by Lindsay Tigar | COMMENT

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Right now, I'm sitting on a game reserve in South Africa in sweatpants, my hair up in a messy bun, iced coffee collecting residue by my laptop. Earlier today, while the East Coast was still sleeping, I hiked through the bush nearby, passing by giraffes, zebras and baboons. As a full-time freelancer and traveler, no two days are ever quite the same and my scenery changes as often as my time zone. Most would say I'm very lucky and I would tend to agree, even though, yes, I've worked diligently to arrive at this lifestyle. But even as I sit here in near-perfect weather, listening to the breeze tickle its way through the plains, I'm hyper-focused on one thing.

A breakout.

Or, rather, a slew of them along my jawline, forming a constellation of imperfection. They are red and blotchy, and though I just turned 30, my hormones continue to cause these incessant zits consistently. I've tried everything—Proactiv, Accutane, tea tree oil, antibiotics, serums, creams, lasers, cutting out dairy, you name it—and, well, I've succumbed to the fact I might never have smooth pores. Admittedly, as I've aged (and after Accutane) my skin has become less cystic but still: an untimely breakout can distract me from nearly everything else positive about my life.

My skin has always been my greatest complaint about my appearance and the one aspect that has the power to transform my self-worth and perception. Though overall, I consider myself attractive, I'm constantly comparing myself to women (and to my friends) who seemingly have perfect skin. I will only take a selfie or a picture in certain lighting, much to the annoyance of those I love. I usually turn with my back to the camera for posting on Instagram, for fear the blisters will shine through any filter I apply. I usually use a dot of concealer to do most things—even hiking this morning—as it makes me more comfortable. I get visibly annoyed with my besties when they encourage me to skip makeup, growling with envy at their no-makeup-needed skin. I sometimes avoid mirrors when my skin is especially bad and have even been known to cancel dates, happy hours or adventures if I'm feeling down about it.

While I would never argue my poor self-esteem in this area of my life is comparable to a traumatic event, skin has a major impact on our sense of worth and value. In honor of Mental Health Awareness Month, I spoke with psychologists to better understand how common this type of struggle is, and for my own happiness and health, how to better cope. If you suffer from acne that creates doubts about your beauty, may this guide give us a shimmer of hope and reminder that even with zits of all shapes and sizes—we're all still gorgeous.

Image via Emilija Manevska/Getty

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