1. Find the Good In a high school psychology class, we were asked to partner up and make lists of the things we liked about ourselves. I happened to be with one of the cutest, most popular boys in school. I sat, jotting down with my nervously sweaty hand what I considered my best qualities:
1. Good at basketball
2. Pretty smile
3. Nice
I looked at his paper and it was blank. I panicked. Was he too cool for this exercise? Was I too uncool? (Spoiler alert, I was.) I doodled for a couple minutes until I started worrying about our grade for non-participation.
"Why aren't you writing anything?" I said.
He looked at me with genuine bewilderment.
"I can't think of anything," he shrugged.
How could this be? This was my first glimpse into how people viewed themselves wasn't necessarily how the outside world saw them. It was eye-opening.
How about your dreamy blue eyes? Your prowess on the hockey rink? Your lopsided smirk?
"You smell good," I blurted.
He wrote it down.
1. Wear cologne
Here's the thing, lots of times, that nasty voice in our heads won't let us see the good in ourselves. Shut that negative voice up. If you can't, try asking your friends what your best three qualities are. My best friend did this for me in college: one of mine was my easy laughter and happy personality. I kept it in my wallet to pull out in times of emergency, like job interviews, breakups, and plain old bad days. It has since disintegrated from numerous folding and unfolding, but the words are still etched on my heart.
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