Ok, as we explained before, celebrities were deemed beauty disasters if they continually participated in bad beauty behavior. Case and point: Lindsay Lohan. She just can't seem to keep her little orange self away from the self-tanner, spray-tanning booth, tanning bed, etc. Albert Einstein (a bit of a hair mess himself) once said, "the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Well Lindsay, whatever it is you are doing to make yourself that color, it will continue to make you look like a Cheeto and therefore a train wreck. Contrary to what you must believe, it is possible to have a natural looking glow, just look here at your fellow celeb sisters that sport gorgeous, natural-looking tans.
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Cher
Cher has continued to push the envelope with her style for more decades now than she'd like to admit. But we think it's time for her to stop trying to "turn back time" by means of plastic surgery. And while she's at it, she should also avoid skunky-looking highlights and consider ditching the two-length haircut, er, wig. We love your voice Cher, but your style, not so much.
Britney has been through a lot, and we are completely sympathetic and proud of her recent accomplishments. But (you knew it was coming) her unsightly extensions and plain ol' tacky style made her an obvious addition to this list. There is no "get out of jail" free card when it comes to some of the worst extensions we have seen on a celebrity. Ever. In fact, Britney's hair has failed so many times that it has its own best and worst photo gallery.
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Tyra Banks
Tyra is a tricky one -- sometimes she looks fierce and sometimes she totally misses the mark. But in this case, what's true in baseball is true in beauty: three strikes and you're -- out. We think she, like many celebs, is surrounded by too many "yes" people, which is why when she decides to wear a crimped, burgundy, half-up bouffant, nobody tells her it's a bad idea. In any case, Tyra has gotten a little crazy with her 'dos on one too many occasions, so now it's time for someone, anyone (us?) to say "no", it's not working.
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Courtney Love
You knew this was coming, and now it's time.
Courtney Love is not only a beauty train wreck; she is the conductor -- leading the way to disaster one public appearance at a time (sad and unfortunate, but true). Love has the whole kit and caboodle: the hair, the makeup, the plastic surgery -- her look screams "I'm a mess". We'll admit there's something to be said for punk and all its grungy subversive glory, but Courtney is no longer making a statement with this look. She is just scaring people.
Next station stop: Hollywood beauty disaster lane. Please check any previous celebrity attachments and place any personal feelings of guilt in the overhead compartment. Now, relax, sit back and enjoy feasting your eyes on celebrities that just can't stop themselves from sporting scary makeup looks and terrifying hairstyles. They're tacky, they're wacky, they're truly rough when it comes to beauty.
Before our trip, a couple of small (safety) disclaimers: No. 1: We here at Total Beauty are aware of the fact that it must be hard to have your picture taken all the time, especially when you're not feeling, acting or looking your best. No. 2: We acknowledge that there is a difference between high-fashion, cutting edge beauty choices, and plain old beauty disasters trying to pass as avant garde. No. 3: We are pretty confident that all of the ladies that have garnered "train wreck" status, have made their careers based on the idea that any press is good press.
Also note, these bright-shining beacons of beauty blunders should not be outcast from any sort of pretty committee -- they're just being recognized for the fact that they continue to laugh in the face of big beauty no-no's every chance they get. And just so you know, these beauty train wrecks have not only made one regrettable bad hair decision or makeup collision, or even one plastic surgery slip up. These ladies are all-out repeat beauty disaster offenders. Some are in recovery and should be applauded for their recent "get it together" efforts, but others, well, not so much. But, at least if they don't learn from their own mistakes, we're all learning from them.
So without further ado, let's take a little trip to the beauty hall of shame and indulge ourselves with some pure, good ol' fashioned celebrity beauty judgment.
