It's important to understand that biology (and your mind) play a huge role in the strength of your orgasm, but there are tricks to help you bring down the house with an earth-shattering orgasm.

First, get in plenty of foreplay. "Going straight for the clitoris doesn't work," explains Cavanah. Instead, practice the art of delayed gratification. Prolonging sexual buildup can be extremely effective for generating back-arching orgasms. "Take some time to make your way down their body and tease and stimulate other parts of the body first."

And don't count on intercourse alone to cut it. The clitoris is a woman's pleasure center. While women can get off through internal stimulation, Millheiser says a majority of women achieve the big O through clitoral stimulation.

"The vagina doesn't actually have sensory receptors internally," Millheiser says. "But the legs of the clitoris run on either side of the vaginal wall and these legs move during penile penetration -- which explains why some women can have internal orgasms."

Usually, this comes down to the simplest -- and yet hardest -- piece of advice: Communication. "Most people don't get any kind of sex education that covers how to give your partner pleasure," says Cavanah. "The way it happens in movies where 'the one' knows exactly the right way to give you a mind-blowing orgasm is a myth."

Good sex works because people talk to each other about it, she says. You can't read your partner's mind, so you shouldn't expect them to try to read yours when you're being intimate. Millheiser says it's important for women to express to their partner what it is they're enjoying in bed." Even randomly telling your partner what gets you going in bed in the middle of the afternoon is sexy," Millheiser says. So make it fun and give your boo some praise.

If there's not much to praise these days, Millheiser recommends this no-fail trick: Handwriting. "Take your partners hands and place them exactly where you want them to be," Millheiser says. "In doing so, you're guiding your partner to the pleasure centers of your body and receiving the stimulation you want."

As fun as those drunken one-night-stands were in college, alcohol can hinder or even prevent the sweet release. Just like guys get whisky dick, women tend to go numb. "Excessive alcohol intake can make it difficult for a woman to reach an orgasm," Millheiser says. "Alcohol suppresses psychological inhibitions, but causes the rest of the body's system to slow down, including blood flow to the clitoris." Which means no orgasm.

Millheiser says for some women, a small amount of alcohol can relax them and help them let go of certain inhabitations that may be interfering with having an orgasm. However, large amounts of alcohol can dampen sexual response, making an orgasm more difficult to achieve. So while a glass or two might be fine, avoid taking down the whole bottle of rosé.

How many times have you laid there while your partner is eating you like a Chinese buffet only to get super close to coming and lose it? (Raises hand.)

It could be due to primary orgasmia, a condition that prevents women from having an orgasm. According to Millheiser, women who experience this have a similar profile. Usually she's type A and in her early 20s. For these women, they can experience the pleasurable buildup but lose it out of the blue. "They're usually young (but not always) and otherwise healthy," Millheiser says. "Often times it's a mental situation they're not allowing themselves to go over that hill. It can be fear of the unknown or loss of control." Again, Millheiser says practicing mindfulness is a great way to overcome this sexual speed bump. So focus on your partner's breathing. Once they direct the attention to you, focus on the sensations happening in your body.

First of all, stop that thinking this instant. Sex is meant to be fun and pleasurable, you're not trying to pass the Bar exam. So if you're experiencing low self-esteem, do something that makes you feel confident. Whether that be buying lingerie for yourself or hitting up a sexy workout class -- or any workout class for that matter. Research shows that regular exercise boosts mood and self-esteem.

Another option? Cavanah says attending sex workshops like her Art of the Blow Job Workshop is a great way to increase confidence in the bedroom. "While we do teach techniques, the core of the workshop is about building confidence," Cavanah says. Attending similar workshops can help you learn about feel-good points, different bodies and how they work from a pleasure standpoint. "Taking time as an adult to seek out that knowledge will make you a better partner in many ways."