Gone are the microwavable meals, cheese plates, and blissful dairy desserts of last week. While I'm on this plan, here's a typical day:
Breakfast: Herbal tea and a banana with a tablespoon of almond butter
Snack: Carrots and hummus
Lunch: A big arugula salad, topped with warm beets and pine nuts
Snack: Bell peppers and hummus
Dinner: I order the "I am Humble" from the vegan-friendly celeb hotspot called Café Gratitude. The description: Indian curried lentils over local brown rice or quinoa with oven-roasted Garnet yams and sautéed spinach drizzled with a spicy mint chutney and sweet tamarind sauce. Finished with chopped scallion. It's delicious, filling and so appetizing (and smugly healthy) that I just have to Instagram it. So much for that "humble" affirmation.
Breakfast: Herbal tea and a banana with a tablespoon of almond butter
Snack: Carrots and hummus
Lunch: A big arugula salad, topped with warm beets and pine nuts
Snack: Bell peppers and hummus
Dinner: I order the "I am Humble" from the vegan-friendly celeb hotspot called Café Gratitude. The description: Indian curried lentils over local brown rice or quinoa with oven-roasted Garnet yams and sautéed spinach drizzled with a spicy mint chutney and sweet tamarind sauce. Finished with chopped scallion. It's delicious, filling and so appetizing (and smugly healthy) that I just have to Instagram it. So much for that "humble" affirmation.
The Good:
Half way through and I've lost three pounds. I've also noticed that my skin is clearer than it's been in months. It's a stark difference from what I usually experience around this time of the month, and my whole face feels less puffy and inflamed. This alone might be enough to make me stay away from SAD GAS forever, but there are a few other benefits as well. Since I'm officially off sugar, I'm not experiencing mood and energy swings. When 3 p.m. rolls around, I am missing my uppers, but then I also don't have to deal with the sometimes anxiety-inducing effect of coming off of a sugar high.
The Bad:
I really, really miss cheese. Gnawing on carrots is making my teeth hurt. I miss the bubbles in my water (Dr. Chutkan advises giving up all carbonation, since they make you bloated) and the sugar and cream in my coffee.
The Ugly:
An observation that is ugly and glorious all at once: the bowel movement benefits of this plan are something to write home about. They're not, however, something you want to write about and have your name tied to forever on the internet, so I'll leave it at this: The "light, tight and bright," tagline of this plan is spot on. My body feels lighter and more "cleansed" than it has in recent memory.
Half way through and I've lost three pounds. I've also noticed that my skin is clearer than it's been in months. It's a stark difference from what I usually experience around this time of the month, and my whole face feels less puffy and inflamed. This alone might be enough to make me stay away from SAD GAS forever, but there are a few other benefits as well. Since I'm officially off sugar, I'm not experiencing mood and energy swings. When 3 p.m. rolls around, I am missing my uppers, but then I also don't have to deal with the sometimes anxiety-inducing effect of coming off of a sugar high.
The Bad:
I really, really miss cheese. Gnawing on carrots is making my teeth hurt. I miss the bubbles in my water (Dr. Chutkan advises giving up all carbonation, since they make you bloated) and the sugar and cream in my coffee.
The Ugly:
An observation that is ugly and glorious all at once: the bowel movement benefits of this plan are something to write home about. They're not, however, something you want to write about and have your name tied to forever on the internet, so I'll leave it at this: The "light, tight and bright," tagline of this plan is spot on. My body feels lighter and more "cleansed" than it has in recent memory.
I'm lucky enough to work in an office where we're provided with free carbonated beverages. Fruit snacks, chips, and candy are also plentiful. I'm talking entire bags of Skittles, people. The 10-year-old in me has a really hard time looking at a bag of Cheetos (which we also have here) and not eating just a few. While on the plan, here's what kept me focused on not cheating:
1. Everyone knew I was dieting.
Everyone in the office is aware that I'm seeking "Gutbliss," so if I were to try to sneak even a Tootsie Roll, they'd definitely call me out. While this is kind of annoying, it's keeping me honest.
2. I don't have any junk in my pantry. I don't even have a pantry.
Once I get home, it's pretty easy to stick to my diet, since I don't have anything I can just snack on mindlessly. If you're not going through a kitchen renovation while on this plan, I recommend removing all of those SAD GAS items from your stock -- that way, you won't be tempted to indulge when you're hungry.
3. Keeping alternative snacks on standby.
Pine nuts are my new indulgence. I keep them, and some clementines, with me at all times to satisfy any cravings I might have.
1. Everyone knew I was dieting.
Everyone in the office is aware that I'm seeking "Gutbliss," so if I were to try to sneak even a Tootsie Roll, they'd definitely call me out. While this is kind of annoying, it's keeping me honest.
2. I don't have any junk in my pantry. I don't even have a pantry.
Once I get home, it's pretty easy to stick to my diet, since I don't have anything I can just snack on mindlessly. If you're not going through a kitchen renovation while on this plan, I recommend removing all of those SAD GAS items from your stock -- that way, you won't be tempted to indulge when you're hungry.
3. Keeping alternative snacks on standby.
Pine nuts are my new indulgence. I keep them, and some clementines, with me at all times to satisfy any cravings I might have.
Confession time: I had a moment (okay, a few hours) of weakness. On day six, I suddenly felt the need to consume pizza. Before I could change my mind, I walked down to my old neighborhood joint and ordered a pizza. In my defense, it was a kale and spinach pizza -- basically a salad on top of bread, right? The worst part: It wasn't even good. Afterward, feeling bad, but unable to stop myself, I fueled my guilt by downing some coconut ice cream (which is allowed!) and a vegan pastry (which has soy, so it's not allowed.) While wallowing in self-pity, I remembered something Chutkan said:
"Most of us are 'toxing' 80 percent of the time and detoxing 20 percent of the time. And we should really think about flipping that [so that we're] detoxing 80 percent of the time."
I chalk my caving up to my 20 percent and vow to tack another day on to the initial 10.
"Most of us are 'toxing' 80 percent of the time and detoxing 20 percent of the time. And we should really think about flipping that [so that we're] detoxing 80 percent of the time."
I chalk my caving up to my 20 percent and vow to tack another day on to the initial 10.
The hardest part of this plan hasn't been giving up my beloved sweets or nixing my daily dairy. It hasn't even been resisting all of the holiday goodies that are coming into the office. It's been making myself work out.
Did I forget to mention this part of the "Gutbliss" detox?
"Move. Get sweaty as often as you can, ideally at least three times a week."
Not only does sweating help with your digestion, Chutkan says, it also increases blood flow to the skin, which is where you skin picks up nutrients (vital for a healthy glow). Exercise also boosts feel-good hormones like serotonin and endorphin while decreasing the stress hormone cortisol. In other words, it's a way to feel really, really great about everything.
The first five days of the plan, I convinced myself it was way too cold to go to the gym. (For a Florida-born California girl, 50 degrees is cold.) By the sixth day, I couldn't ignore Dr. Chutkan's advice any longer. I get myself to the gym (it's in the same office park as our building, so I have NO excuse) and hop on the treadmill. After battling with my inner lazy girl for the first five minutes, I actually start to enjoy it. By the end of the week, I'm taking magazines (required reading when you work at a beauty company -- seriously) with me to read while I huff and puff at a decent pace on an uphill incline. I'm not running marathons yet, but since I usually read magazines while lying in bed, eating ice cream, I consider it a major improvement.
Did I forget to mention this part of the "Gutbliss" detox?
"Move. Get sweaty as often as you can, ideally at least three times a week."
Not only does sweating help with your digestion, Chutkan says, it also increases blood flow to the skin, which is where you skin picks up nutrients (vital for a healthy glow). Exercise also boosts feel-good hormones like serotonin and endorphin while decreasing the stress hormone cortisol. In other words, it's a way to feel really, really great about everything.
The first five days of the plan, I convinced myself it was way too cold to go to the gym. (For a Florida-born California girl, 50 degrees is cold.) By the sixth day, I couldn't ignore Dr. Chutkan's advice any longer. I get myself to the gym (it's in the same office park as our building, so I have NO excuse) and hop on the treadmill. After battling with my inner lazy girl for the first five minutes, I actually start to enjoy it. By the end of the week, I'm taking magazines (required reading when you work at a beauty company -- seriously) with me to read while I huff and puff at a decent pace on an uphill incline. I'm not running marathons yet, but since I usually read magazines while lying in bed, eating ice cream, I consider it a major improvement.
I knew I needed a change when I hopped on the scale a week after Thanksgiving and the number flashed higher than it had ever been. Granted, it was a few days after I had two Thanksgiving dinners in less than 24 hours, but the persistent tightness of my clothing and my general sluggishness suggested that the extra pounds were more than just a few big dinners. After catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror after a shower one night, I thought to myself, 'I can't possibly be pregnant ... right?' Nope. My food baby had just become a permanent fixture.